Trip Day 1: May the Fourth to Cinco de Mayo - Atlanta -> London -> Vienna

Travel days are measured in airport time, not human time, so this is considered Day 1.

I left Atlanta on May the Fourth and arrived at Heathrow on Cinco de Mayo, dressed in the proper ceremonial yellow for these deeply sacred non-holidays.

The Atlanta-to-Heathrow flight was the rough bit. I was wedged into my seat on the left side of the plane, which is apparently not my sleeping side. Total sleep: maybe 30 to 45 minutes.

On the plus side, I finished Dept. Q on my iPad, which ChatGPT recommended after I gave it my TV preferences. I was hooked in the first 3 minutes of episode 1. Nine episodes. Great ending. Season 2 is in the works.

I also finally watched Labyrinth, so now I understand the references on the Labyrinth pinball machine. This counts as culture.

Since I had a five-hour wait at Heathrow before flying to Vienna, I upgraded to Business Class. Better seat, fast-track security, lounge access, food, drinks, and temporary separation from the riffraff, a noble fellowship in which I usually hold full membership.

The lounge even had lounge chairs hidden behind a wall. I attempted a nap, but I’m a side sleeper and they were not designed for my particular brand of collapse. Perhaps sleeping will be my Achilles heel on this trip.

The Heathrow-to-Vienna flight was packed, so apparently I was not the only person with the brilliant idea of going to Austria.

Immigration was a joyless little bonus round: passport inspection, photo, fingerprints, and a careful review of my previous stamps. There was definitely a “Netherlands in November, eh?” vibe, as if I had been caught smuggling stroopwafels.

Peter met me at the exit and drove me back to his house, where we picked up Hanni. Then we made a quick stop at Zum Schwarzen Schaf, which means “The Black Sheep”.

King Andy was there, but I didn’t get a picture. I’ll fix that on Thursday. I call him King Andy because my daughter likes to call me Princessa, and since we’re both named Andy...well, you get the royal succession problem.

I did get a picture with Peter in front of a Maypole, which is supposed to ward off evil spirits. Based on the photo, results were mixed.

After that, we went to Maut Wirtshaus, a local restaurant in Mödling. “Maut” means toll, so the direct translation is the Toll Inn.

More importantly, I got my Wiener Schnitzel. Mission accomplished.

I was completely wiped out, but Peter convinced me to stay awake until midnight so we could celebrate his birthday. It was really 3 AM (or so it felt).

At long last, he is old enough to drink.

Trip Day 2 - Wednesday, May 6, 2026 - Vienna - Peter's Birthday

Today was all about celebrating Peter’s birthday. We drove over to the Westfield shopping center, had lunch at Wok ’N’ Roll, then tackled two escape rooms: Magic Adventure and Houdini.

Magic Adventure may have involved a little extra time, and Houdini may have involved us asking for roughly 20 hints, but we still escaped with 5 minutes to spare, so I’m counting that as a win.

We also worked in a little pinball before heading to a local Heuriger, an Austrian wine garden, for drinks and dinner.

Peter and I sat around talking for a while afterward, but we made it an early night because I was basically falling asleep standing up.

A very good Vienna birthday day.

Trip Day 3 - Thursday, May 7, 2026: Vienna to London

The day started with the usual pain in the ass packing. I HATE PACKING. 

Before the airport, we went to Zum Schwarzen Schaf, which is only open Thursday through Sunday. I finally got my picture with King Andy, clearly the most important royal appointment of the day.

I have no idea what I ordered. I didn’t recognize the German word, so I asked Peter and he said it was the best. Good enough for me. It was basically mac and cheese on steroids, with bacon and other magic involved.

Peter dropped me at the airport, where I stopped at Aida in the gate concourse. They had the famous Sachertorte, which I usually find a bit dry and bland, and the Aida Torte. I asked the server which was better. She said Aida Torte. Excellent call. For the Spanish speakers: torte is not a sandwich. Or is that torta? Either way, in German it means cake, and this one was excellent.

The flight to Heathrow was on time, and I had a limo waiting to take me to the Airbnb. Nice place, right in the middle of things.

Dinner was The Wellington: sticky chicken, beef croquettes, and sticky toffee pudding. Chicken was good. Croquettes were so-so. The sticky toffee pudding beat Gordon Ramsay’s, the airport lounge version, and my own attempt. I still need to retest The Mug House before making a final ruling. Proper scientific research.

This trip includes a serious quest for the best sticky toffee pudding.

After dinner, I hit Tesco Express for ingredients for Salted Butterscotch Double Chocolate Chunk Biscuits. Cookies, for you ignorant yanks. They had about three-quarters of what I needed, so the hunt continues.

I also redecorated the Airbnb already. The couch is now holding the extra bed stuff because I brought my own sheet. 

Trip Day 4 - Friday, May 8, 2026: London

Long day at the office today. By “office,” I mean vacation, and by “work,” I mean walking over 25,000 steps until my feet filed a complaint.

Before the tour, I did a little shopping. On the way back, I passed about 10 or 20 cop cars near Charing Cross Police Station. Two officers crossed the street near me and gave me the friendly English “All right?” greeting. I said something brilliant about either a police station or a donut shop being nearby. One laughed but then looked at me as if he would rather arrest me.

Then I spent most of the day on the Non-touristy & Unseen London with an Urban Planner tour. There were 8 of us, and Fabian was our guide. We started around 10:30 and finished around 5:30, using buses, the Tube, and National Rail to bounce through places like Paddington, Notting Hill, Brixton, Peckham, Rotherhithe, and a few spots I definitely would not have found on my own.

This was not Big Ben / Buckingham Palace London. This was real-people London: markets, side streets, mews, cemeteries, graffiti tunnels, coffee shops, and neighborhoods with actual life in them instead of 4,000 tourists walking diagonally while staring at phones.

After the tour, I went to see I’m Sorry, Prime Minister. I understood maybe 60% of it, which is still better than I understand most corporate meetings. I may have dozed off before intermission, because fresh air and 25,000 steps are apparently a sedative. I considered leaving, but Häagen-Dazs and Diet Coke saved the day.

Also, my Airbnb is pleasantly close to the Radisson at Seven Dials where I’ve stayed before, so I recognized a bunch of streets on the walk to and from the theatre.

Tomorrow’s mission: recover my feet and buy another suitcase in Brixton so I can bring home chocolate from Charbonnel et Walker. My current bag is already at 49 pounds out of 50. Last time, 3 extra pounds cost me $90. A new suitcase is £55. 

Trip Day 5, May 9, 2026 - London

Not as much walking as yesterday, but still over 14,000 steps, so apparently “taking it easy” has a different meaning on vacation.

I started the day with a walk to TK Maxx - yes, TK, not TJ - and bought a suitcase before going to Charbonnel et Walker, because I knew I was about to have a bunch of chocolate to haul around. Good call, since I ended up buying £400 worth of it. The new suitcase still has room, which feels less like a problem and more like a challenge.

On the way back, I came across the Masala Zone restaurant at Picadilly Circus and saw they had brunch, so I tried a Bacon and Masala Omelette Toastie Naan. It's a hybrid Indian/British dish.

Then it was over Waterloo Bridge to the Old Vic for One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. I know the movie, but this production still absolutely got me. Terrific cast, very true to the story, and a well-earned standing ovation.

After that, I headed to Leicester Square Theatre to see Natalie Cuomo, one of the anchors of this trip. I had a ticket to see her in December 2023, but Covid ruined that plan, so this one felt overdue. I even did the stage-door thing like a completely normal person (nobody else was there!) and got a selfie.

Trip Day 6, May 10, 2026 - London

Other than playing pinball, everything went to plan today. I hit 19,000 steps, and my feet voted against standing around playing games. So instead, I’m doing laundry, because after almost a week away, my suitcase has entered its “needs adult supervision” phase.

It was chilly, mostly in the 50s. I kept thinking I should buy a sweatshirt, then kept not buying a sweatshirt. Excellent decision-making all around.

I started at the London Canal Museum, a look back at England entering the industrial age. Entire families lived for years on tiny canal boats, and the boat people were basically their own floating community. Fascinating stuff, and it made my Airbnb kitchen look spacious.

From there, I walked past the British Library, which had a huge queue, and the British Museum, which did not. My bold plan was to enter neither. Success.

Then came the grocery quest. I hit Sainsbury’s and multiple Tesco stores looking for ingredients for my Salted Butterscotch Double Chocolate cookies. The missing item: toffee bits.

Come on, Britain. It’s called English toffee. Help a man out.

At 3 PM, I saw Stranger Things: The First Shadow for the fourth time. It still gave me chills, but I think I may finally be done. Season 5 answered a lot of what the play had been hinting at, so the mystery isn’t quite as mysterious anymore.



Tomorrow: Sherlock Holmes Museum, IKEA for kitchen stuff, cookie baking if the ingredient gods cooperate, and then Austentatious at the Vaudeville Theatre. They ask the audience for the title of a lost Jane Austen novel, and last time they picked Lady Catherine de Burger King. It became a wonderful story of Lord Ronald of the House of McDonald’s trying to secure a merger-marriage with Lady Catherine, while the Colonel tried to win her over with his nuggets.

Trip Day 7, May 11, 2026 - London

A lighter walking day today, which still somehow meant 13,000 steps. Apparently my vacation definition of “taking it easy” is “only mildly abusing my feet.”

The great toffee hunt continued. I stopped at M&S Foodhall and found fudge bits and toffee syrup, which were close, but not quite the answer.

Then I took the Tube from Charing Cross to Baker Street on the Bakerloo line. I’m getting the hang of the Underground, though I still prefer walking because you actually get to see the city. But I was running short on time for Sherlock, and after seeing London traffic barely moving, I decided a cab was not the answer.

At Baker Street, I visited 221B and the Sherlock Holmes Museum. I had been there in 2019 and found it underwhelming then. Good news: it remains faithfully underwhelming. It is all fake, of course, since Sherlock Holmes lived entirely inside Arthur Conan Doyle’s head, but they really commit to the bit.

From there, I walked to IKEA and bought some Airbnb kitchen supplies, including bowls and other baking gear. I also bought lingonberry jam, because IKEA has a way of convincing you that your life has been incomplete without Swedish fruit spread.

Then came my last-ditch toffee stop: Fortnum & Mason. I finally found toffee, but it had to be chopped by hand, because apparently I had chosen the artisanal suffering version of cookie baking.

Back at the Airbnb, I chopped the toffee, chopped the chocolate, melted the butter, and made salted butterscotch chocolate chunk cookies. Verdict: edible, but not my best batch. I think I overdid the chocolate and toffee, which sounds impossible until you actually do it.



The night ended with another round of Austentatious, where the cast improvises an entire Jane Austen-style play based on audience title suggestions. Tonight’s title was Manosphere Park, a play on Mansfield Park. I had no clue what the manosphere was, but my seat neighbors gave me enough of a crash course to follow along.

It was very funny and somehow included the Tate brothers and Louis Theroux. I’ll see them again in Oxford next Sunday.

Trip Day 8, May 12, 2026 - London

Final full day in London, and I went out properly: sweets, walking, theatre, and a stage-door selfie.

The day started with a Chelsea Sweet Treats tour led by Jen Earle, who runs excellent food and chocolate tours around London. I’ve now done three chocolate tours with her, and this time added Chelsea sweets to the list. The Notting Hill Bakery Tour is still waiting for me, because apparently I am building a dessert-based curriculum. Jen's site: https://www.jenniferearle.com/ 

We met at Anya Cafe, and I walked 2.2 miles there because scenery and fresh air and other noble vacation nonsense. By the end of the day I had hit 21,000 steps, so coming back I took the Tube. Screw missing the scenery. Sometimes the scenery can be admired from underground.

The tour hit a bunch of places, and I am hoping my photos remember them better than I do. I mostly remember excellent sweets, good conversation, and the growing realization that “research” is a very flexible word when chocolate is involved.

Tonight’s play was Inter Alia, starring Rosamund Pike. It’s the story of a judge who is uncompromising in sexual assault cases, until a devastating accusation lands inside her own family. Pike was masterful. It’s nearly a one-woman show, with her shifting between roles, moods, arguments, and emotional body blows without ever losing control of the room.

Afterwards, I hung around the stage door, which I first discovered was a real thing after To Kill a Mockingbird and my Matthew Modine photo. Tonight, Rosamund Pike came out, signed merchandise, and did selfies.



So that’s Day 8: Chelsea sweets, 21,000 steps, Tube surrender, a brilliant play, and another lesson in the fine London art of loitering outside theatres politely.

Trip Day 9, May 13, 2026 - London to Milton Keynes

This was one of those days that felt like failure in real time, but somehow ended up successful.

I hate packing. I now have four pieces of luggage: one huge suitcase, one chocolate-filled carry-on, one electronics backpack, and one giant IKEA bag full of kitchen and baking supplies. Travel light? Never heard of her.

A car service took me to Alamo, where I picked up my rental: a Cupra Formentor, which sounds like a spell from Harry Potter but is apparently Spanish. Nice ride, though, especially the lane warnings reminding me not to drift into British wrong-side-of-the-road madness.

First adventure: a roundabout honk. I maintain I was already in it. The other driver may have correctly identified me as “rental car foreigner.”

Then I drove to Dunstable for three games of bowling: 154, 141, and 144 with house shoes and a house ball. I’ll take it.

The Airbnb arrival was less smooth. I found Flat 17. No lockbox. Messaged the host. Wrong building. Found the right one, got inside, then couldn’t lock the door until he explained the magic British ritual: lift the handle first, then turn the key.

Walked the canal area, saw boats and geese with attitude, then had Scotch eggs and bread-and-butter pudding at The Cross Keys. I was full after one Scotch egg. Naturally, I had ordered two. The second one later became dinner, so I’m calling it meal planning. Again: apparent failure, eventual success.

Final crisis: the parking tag slipped between the windshield and dash. In trying to rescue it, I donated a bread knife to the same black hole. ChatGPT suggested tape, a magnet, or a Band-Aid on something wooden. Wooden knife + Band-Aid somehow pulled out the bread knife first, then the tag.



So yes, today was ridiculous. But I’m in, unpacked-ish, parked legally, and calling that a win.

Trip Day 10, May 14, 2026 - Milton Keynes

Bletchley Milton Keynes driving update: still terrifying. There are about 130 roundabouts, and every time I survive one, another appears like a traffic-engineering jump scare. Also, I keep drifting too far left, but thankfully the car nudges me back when I’m being an American menace.

Today’s main event was Bletchley Park. I bought what I thought was a Bletchley ticket, but it turned out to be for The National Museum of Computing. Same grounds, different institutions. Naturally, I went to both, because when life gives you accidental computer-history tickets, you lean in.

Bletchley has a new AI exhibit, and I completely geeked out. One display let me record a few phrases and then generated my voice. Equal parts fascinating and slightly terrifying, which is basically the modern AI experience.

I also took a guided tour, saw the Enigma and Bombe exhibits, and then headed over to TNMOC for Colossus, more computing history, and because the universe understands me, a Data East Simpsons pinball machine from 1990. Some drop targets weren’t working, but it was still playable and in pretty good condition.

Afterwards, I went to IKEA to return a knife and somehow spent about three times the refund. I love shopping. I also tried a Hotdog Mash, which is exactly what it sounds like: hot dog, mashed potatoes, fried onions. Interesting. Not my favorite. The Swedes may keep that one.

A bit of trip-planning philosophy: I usually build trips around anchors. Last year it was Nina Conti in Canterbury. November will be the Dutch Pinball Open. This trip started with Natalie Cuomo in London on the 9th, close enough to Peter’s birthday in Vienna on the 6th to make it a strange but workable plan. Milton Keynes pulled me back because of Bletchley Park, and because I’d read The Enigma Girl by Henry Porter, which put the area in my head.

Once I have the anchors, I pick the dates, hunt flights by day of week, then fill in the plays, food tours, weird museums, and occasional questionable IKEA meals.



The pictures and one video tell the rest.

Trip Day 11, May 15, 2026 – Milton Keynes / Woolmer Green / Oxford

Day 11 had chocolate, Oxford history, and my most important academic work: sticky toffee pudding research.

First up: Chocolate Making Workshop at The Secret Truffletier. Phillip taught us how to temper chocolate. He made it look easy. I made it look like a crime scene with better snacks. We made three bars and six lollipops with assorted toppings. My artistic ability remains theoretical, but I had a blast, especially with Larry from the family group. His lollipops looked better than mine, so naturally I documented the evidence.

Then I drove to Oxford and used the Park & Ride, which was absolutely the right call. Trying to park in central Oxford feels like a punishment invented by medieval scholars. £2.50 to park and ride the bus in and back? Sold. I’ll try the same approach in Cambridge tomorrow.

Before the tour, I hit the Turf Tavern. The British cheese toastie plan failed because they were out, but science must continue. Their sticky toffee pudding with clotted cream ice cream is now officially #1 on the leaderboard after precise mashing, sampling, and spiritual reflection.

Current standings:

1. Turf Tavern
2. Mug House
3. The Wellington
4. Gordon Ramsay’s Savoy Grill
5. Airport Lounge at Heathrow

The afternoon was a Walking Tour with an Oxford Alumnus. Ross, our guide, has a PhD in Computer Science and explained how Oxford’s college system works under the university umbrella. There were only two others on the tour, a very nice Dutch couple, so it felt almost like a private lesson. We visited Balliol College, saw the dining hall being set for a formal dinner, and got the greatest hits: Radcliffe Camera, Hertford Bridge, old colleges, famous buildings, and centuries of academic drama.

Then it was back to Milton Keynes. My UK driving is improving, with help from lane assist. I tested it on an empty highway stretch and the car gently shoved me back into sanity.

Final score: only one left curb clipped, and that one had no line, so I’m calling it progress.

Trip Day 12, May 16, 2026 - Cambridge

I think I’m finally getting less anxious about driving on the left. Now I’m mostly anxious about accidentally financing the British government through speeding tickets. In America, I’m used to treating the speed limit as a loose suggestion. Here I’m trying to behave, helped by my rental car gently chiming when I creep more than about 5% over. Also, last year I got a speeding ticket in the Netherlands for going 8 km/h over the speed limit: €64.

I drove to Cambridge, parked at Madingley Park & Ride, and took the bus in for £4.50. Absolutely the right call. Cambridge streets and parking did not need to be today’s boss battle.

First mission: coffee. I had run out of my Costco Don Pablo, and my replacements - Fortnum & Mason fancy-pants coffee, IKEA dark roast, and convenience-store Taylors - were not cutting it. ChatGPT sent me to Hot Numbers, where I asked for something chocolatey, low-acid, good for drip/filter brewing, and ground. They had beans, but happily ground them. Still didn’t cut it though. IKEA is still #1. I will continue looking.

I also had one terrible cappuccino elsewhere, because apparently science requires a control group.

Then came Gerla’s food tour with Sarah and Matt, who had moved from Birmingham and live nearby. Eight stops: fudge, pastries, cheese, a drink stop, halloumi tacos, falafel, Indian market food, and finally tiramisu at Tradizioni on Mill Road. The original Italian stop had closed, so Gerla marched us an extra 1.5 miles for dessert. That’s leadership I’ll gladly follow.

After that I did another alumni-led walking tour, this time with Mia and one other attendee, Kate from Chicago. Cambridge and Oxford are cousins with different architecture: beautiful colleges, complicated traditions, and a system where the college you choose matters more than you might expect. I also learned about the Night Climbers, the Mathematical Bridge, the Corpus Clock, and the dangers of punting, which remains a firm no from me.



I could have squeezed in Death on the Nile at the Arts Theatre, but after about 19,000 steps, driving back while my brain still had a few roundabouts left, was the smarter call.

Trip Day 13, May 17, 2026 - Milton Keynes / Oxford

I had planned a pinball day at Pixel Bunker, but first went back to Bletchley Park and then The National Museum of Computing (TNMOC).

At Bletchley, I found the B-Block Museum, which was mainly Turing focused. Alan Turing remains one of the most brilliant and tragic figures in modern history: codebreaker, mathematician, early AI thinker, and a man treated disgracefully by the country he helped save.

He was convicted for “gross indecency” in 1952 because he was gay, subjected to hormone treatment, and died from cyanide poisoning in 1954 at only 41. He received a royal pardon in 2013.

At TNMOC, I watched a Colossus demo. ENIAC got the headlines, but Colossus was already working in 1943, helping break Lorenz/Tunny traffic, a German cipher system separate from Enigma.

Colossus did not lose the “first computer” story because it was unimportant. It lost because it was secret. Deeply secret. Official Secrets Act secret. Most machines were destroyed after the war, and the people who built and operated them could not talk about what they had done.

So ENIAC got the press. Colossus got buried.

The guide said captured Lorenz machines apparently ended up with the Russians after the war, which may be why Britain kept Colossus at GCHQ into the 1960s. Nothing like Cold War paranoia to keep a world-changing invention hidden.

There is still debate over the “first computer” title because Colossus was not a stored-program general-purpose computer. Standing in front of the rebuild, that felt secondary.

Then I finally made it to Pixel Bunker for pinball, where all five machines seemed to have chosen mechanical rebellion. Every one had some kind of issue. Pinball day: postponed by pinball.

Evening was Oxford for Austentatious at the New Theatre. Tonight’s “lost Jane Austen novel” was Petticoats and Pandemonium. I was waiting to see how they would work “pandemonium” in. At the very end, they did.

Then came the one-hour night drive back through the roundabout gauntlet. Less traffic helped, but Milton Keynes after dark is still a practical exam in left-side driving.



My mantra: stay left, left lane, be left.

Trip Day 14, May 18, 2026 - Warwick + Stratford-Upon-Avon

Today’s plan actually went to plan: Warwick Castle, the Castle Dungeon, Stratford-upon-Avon, the MAD Museum, and Loxley’s for Coronation Chicken and Sticky Toffee Pudding.

It was about 120 miles of driving, with narrow roads, random rain, and so much left-side driving comfort that I’m now worried I’ll return to ’merica and forget where the steering wheel belongs.

Warwick Castle began as William the Conqueror’s 1068 project and then got added to, fortified, fancied up, sold off, and eventually Merlin-ized into a medieval theme-park/history hybrid. The castle itself was impressive but a bit ho-hum for me. The Dungeon, though, was great fun: dark corridors, stairs, actors jumping out, creepy scenes, and just enough audience interaction to make me grateful I was not selected for execution.

Stratford-upon-Avon was next. I did the required “Look, Shakespeare was born here” tourist checkbox, then fled to the Mechanical Art & Design Museum, which was far more my speed: weird little machines, buttons to push, and enough mechanical nonsense to make me happy.

Final stop: Loxley’s. Coronation chicken was fine. Fries were delightful. Sticky toffee pudding came with clotted cream ice cream and rum butterscotch sauce. It was sweeter than Turf Tavern, but still excellent.

Current Sticky Toffee Pudding research ranking:

1. Turf Tavern
2. Loxley’s
3. Mug House
4. The Wellington
5. Gordon Ramsay’s Savoy Grill
6. Airport lounge



Science demands further testing.

Trip Day 15, May 19, 2026 - Bourneville + Birmingham

Last full day of the adventure. Tomorrow I head back to Atlanta, assuming the chocolate suitcase can still be persuaded to close.

I started at Cadbury World, which was part chocolate history, part kid-focused mini amusement park, and part school-group obstacle course. There were some genuinely interesting bits: John Cadbury founded the business in 1824, and his sons later helped turn it into the Cadbury empire, including the move to Bournville.

So yes, there was education. It was just wrapped in 4D cinema, loud music, moving benches, and the faint sense that I was one school group away from surrender.

After that I drove the few miles into Birmingham, parked near the Pinball Factory, and walked down to the Bullring while waiting for league to start. The Bullring is enormous, Selfridges looks like a spaceship covered in thumbtacks, and Birmingham gave me the usual mix of old, new, weird, and “wait, Subway sells what?”

At 5, I joined the Pinball Factory weekly league. It was 9 machines, one game each, scores entered into Matchplay. Since it’s a multi-week league, my one-night cameo won’t mean anything official, but it was still fun. I was briefly #1 because I finished early, then reality arrived as better players posted their scores. I ended up 5th out of 11, which is aggressively on-brand for me. I did set the #1 score on Star Trek, though. Small victory accepted.

The winner had 1.3 billion on Godzilla. I had 19.5 million. He was Godzilla. I was one of the tiny people running away from Godzilla.



Now the only remaining question is whether I reopen the packed suitcase to add the extra Cadbury bars, or eat all 9 before morning. Decisions, decisions.

Trip Day 16, May 20, 2026 - The Return Home - Trip Summary

I drove to the airport from Milton Keynes, and because I had the fuel refill option, I returned the car on fumes with 15 miles of range left. That may be the closest I have ever come to achieving rental car mathematical perfection.

I got back from my adventure on Wednesday and made it through customs with my 30 pounds of chocolate unchallenged. I tried to declare it, but there was no place to do so. Just a sign saying "This way to ATL".

Advantage Andy.

On Thursday, I headed to Marietta Meltyard and presented some of that chocolate to the Mavens of Multiball Ladies League. This was both generous and strategic, because there was no reasonable way I should be left alone with 30 pounds of chocolate in my house. Really, the ladies were doing ME a favor!

Here is the final trip summary.

Best Experiences:

Peter's birthday in Vienna

Natalie Cuomo

Jen Earle's Chelsea Bakery Tour

Turf Tavern sticky toffee pudding

Chocolate Making Workshop

Peter's birthday in Vienna was one of the emotional highlights of the trip. There were escape rooms, good company, birthday energy, and the successful delivery of the Dr. No translite, courtesy of Portal Pinball. Bond, Peter Bond.

Natalie Cuomo was a huge highlight. She was hilarious, I was in the front row, and I introduced myself as Highlighter Andy. Thanks, Nancy.

Some travel moments you plan, and some just become ridiculous in the best possible way.

Jen Earle's Chelsea Bakery Tour was another standout. It combined walking, sweets, local food knowledge, and the kind of guide who makes the whole thing feel personal instead of manufactured.

The Turf Tavern sticky toffee pudding moved directly into the number one spot in my ongoing research project. This is not casual dessert eating. This is serious scientific inquiry involving sauce absorption, texture analysis, and controlled mashing.

The Chocolate Making Workshop at the Secret Truffletier in Woolmer Green was also a big win. Hairnet on. Dignity off. Chocolate mode engaged.

Fails:

Baking cookies - no proper toffee to be found, except Fortnum & Mason toffee I had to chop up.

Coffee - after I ran out of my own brand after a week, I never found a satisfactory replacement. I tried Fortnum & Mason, IKEA Dark Roast, Starbucks Guatemalan, Hot Numbers Body and Soul, and Taylors Lazy Sunday. I was very glad to have my own coffee, Don Pablo from Costco, when I got home.

I did learn something, though. After years of machine drip, I may be a manual pour-over convert. Just put enough water to wet the grounds and then fill it. Tried it the last 2 days and it makes an exceptional cup of coffee.

Cadbury World - too much "trying to be a theme park" and not enough actual chocolate magic. Bigger, busier, and much more kid-focused than expected.

Wearing a Cinco de Mayo shirt in Europe - apparently that is very much an American holiday. Europe pretty much does not know Cinco de Mayo or Taco Tuesday. Lesson learned.

IKEA Hotdog Mash - hot dog, mashed potatoes, and fried onions. Interesting in theory. Horrible in practice. I only ate half, which may have been half too much.

Fail with success:

My Airbnb in Milton Keynes had garage parking, but it required a parking pass on the dash. I pushed the pass too far forward and it slipped into a 4-inch slit where fingers could not reach.
I tried a butter knife. No luck.
Then I thought, why not TWO butter knives, like a giant set of tweezers?
This resulted in one butter knife joining the parking pass in the black hole of the dashboard.
At my wits’ end, I consulted ChatGPT. It suggested using a thin wooden stick, like a ruler, with sticky tape on the end. It even told me to go buy Sellotape. It was late, and I might have found some, but it also suggested a Band-Aid.
I had some 1.5 x 3-inch Band-Aids and found a wooden knife in the drawer.
To my surprise, the first attempt got the butter knife back.
The second attempt got the parking pass back.
AI won that round.

Trip by the numbers:

16 days

208,000 steps

6 plays

1 comedy show

2 escape rooms

3 sticky toffee puddings officially ranked

4 museums

2 pinball venues

1 bowling alley

30 pounds of chocolate

Theater:

I'm Sorry, Prime Minister - 4/10, because I had not watched Yes Minister or Yes, Prime Minister from the 1980s, so the context was mostly lost on me.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest - 10/10, great story, great actors, and a performance that really landed. This was the only show with a standing ovation.

Stranger Things: The First Shadow - 9/10. This was my fourth time seeing it, and it still worked. The Season 5 release changed some of the impact, but it remains a very strong production with fantastic special effects!

Austentatious in London - 9/10. Very funny, even though I missed some of the British humor and references.

Inter Alia - 10/10. Rosamund Pike was terrific, and the story was a real moral dilemma. It was one of the best theater experiences of the trip. About half the audience gave a standing ovation (including me).

Austentatious in Oxford - 7/10. Still fun, but the sound was not great and there were local Oxford references I did not understand.

Comedy:

Natalie Cuomo - 10/10. She was hilarious, and the front-row interaction made it even better. When she noticed my neon yellow shirt, I told her Nancy Pantss had dubbed me Highlighter Andy. Somehow, that nickname made it all the way to a London comedy show.

Food:

Chelsea Bakery Tour with Jen Earle - this was my third (or perhaps 4th? tour with Jen). She's terrific and very knowledgeable about chocolate and food.

Cambridge Hidden Food Tour

Chocolate Making Workshop at the Secret Truffletier in Woolmer Green

There was also a lot of sticky toffee pudding, bakery research, chocolate sampling, the IKEA Hotdog Mash incident, and ongoing coffee disappointment. Not every edible decision was a triumph, but the important ones were.

Escape Rooms with Peter and Hanni:

Houdini

Magic Adventure, which was very Harry Potter-like

Both rooms were successful escapes, with a very Andy-style hint strategy. Rose and I have always gone into escape rooms admitting that we are experienced, but also that we are shameless about asking for hints. We will dance for hints, threaten to sing for hints, and ask for help the moment a puzzle starts turning into a brick wall. That was my approach here too. I introduced our team to Elli, our Game Master, by escape-room life experience: Hanni as the newcomer, Peter as the teenager, and me as the old man. My role was mostly keeping us organized, watching for when we were getting stuck, and asking the group when it was time for a hint. They always agreed, which means I am calling that leadership and not bossiness. We never got our official time for Houdini, but Elli told us we escaped Magic Adventure with about five minutes to spare. Hanni was useful, Peter was game, we escaped both rooms, and Hanni said she enjoyed it, so I am counting that as a win.

Sticky Toffee Pudding Research, ranked:

Turf Tavern

Loxley's

The Wellington

Turf Tavern is currently my favorite of the six sticky toffee puddings I have tested overall. Scientific research will continue locally, because apparently there is sticky toffee pudding in the Metro Atlanta area and I have responsibilities.

Museums:

London Canal Museum

Mechanical Art & Design Museum

The National Museum of Computing

Bletchley Park

Bletchley Park and The National Museum of Computing were the strongest museum experiences for me. Alan Turing, Colossus, codebreaking, early computing, and early AI all landed hard. Colossus especially filled in a missing piece for me: not forgotten because it was less important, but because it was classified.

Pinball:

Pixel Bunker - 1/10 because the machines were malfunctioning.

Pinball Factory - 10/10 because it had 20+ machines, friendly people, and a tournament.

Pixel Bunker was a disappointment, but Pinball Factory made up for it. Good machines, good people, and an actual tournament. That is much closer to what I was hoping for.

Bowling:

GoBowling in Dunstable

Bowling made the list because apparently even on a trip full of theater, food, chocolate, museums, escape rooms, and pinball, I still find a way to roll a ball at things.

And that was the trip: Vienna, London, chocolate, theater, comedy, sticky toffee pudding, escape rooms, pinball, bowling, bad coffee, successful chocolate non-smuggling because I tried to declare it, and enough walking to justify most of the dessert.